We connect nannies and families every day. So we know how to get your relationship off on the right foot.
A common faux pas we see from nannies is comparing the new family to their previous families.
Talking about your ex and comparing the good old days to the present is never a wise idea in love. No one likes to be compared to an old relationship. This is true in love and it is true in the world of nannies. No mother wants to constantly hear how wonderful the last nanny’s charges were, especially a new mother. She wants her nanny to fall in love with HER baby or children if she is not a new mum.
We like nannies to bond with their work family and love the children as their own. When the job ends and they take a new position, sometimes nannies can’t help but talk about their old boss and their children. It breaks the mood. I know the nanny has no desire to upset her new employer. She probably has no idea how her memories of the good old days in her previous job are bothering her new employer. This is what her new boss thinks: “I’ll never be able to do…” “I will never be able to do…” “How will we ever be as good as this family?” Comparisons are difficult, especially with new relationships.
At the agency, we are custodians of two points of view: the nanny’s and the family’s. This particular topic comes up again and again. Think of the example of romantic relationships: the bad plan is to keep referring to and remembering Peter when your new partner is called James.
Nannies: Try not to make comparisons as you work to build trust with this new family. Make your new employers feel confident in this HUGE decision they have just made! You are a team, so let them know that you are!
Parents: Have a chat with your nanny to let her know that while you can’t be her old family, you hope yours will be able to build a beautiful, lasting relationship with her too.